Today’s workout was great. I really look forward to it everyday. I am getting really frustrated. I spent last night in tears because I look around at everyone in the class, and they can do so much more than I can. I just want to jump in there and go at it full speed ahead, but with my back in so much pain I am afraid of really hurting it and then being out of commission for the next 11 weeks. I have eliminated all caffeine and sugar from my diet so I am dealing with this really killer headache that just will not go away. I give props to my all my friends who are going through this same thing right now and going to work everyday. I know that today I just had to pull the shades, crawl into bed, and pull the covers over my head to try and make it stop. Needless to say as I write this now it is still pounding like crazy. I know it will get better and I know that I can push through it. Getting all of my water in is getting a lot better, but I am still struggling with my food. It really scares me how this is going to affect my weight loss this week. I am trying so hard and trying to get really adjusted to all of the new information and the workouts and I am terrified. What if I fail? This runs through my head everyday. Why is eating five times a day and certain things so hard to do? I can’t let this beat me. I want to get strong, healthy, and fit. I want to be all that God made me to be. I think that I might just have to make my food simple and boring. I think that means making my breakfast and lunches the same everyday for a while. I think that it can not hurt to try it, as I need to find something to help. I am looking forward to working out tomorrow, you never know what is in store, but I welcome it. Sorry that I can not write any more tonight, but with my head pounding I want to try and do something other than looking at the computer screen. I can’t sleep so I think that I am going to just try and lay down and close my eyes, the dark cool room I am sure will help somewhat.
Carrie
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